I Hate Birds

Remember my rant about clocks?

Yeah, this rant is similar except it's about birds.

Apparently the clocks have gotten birds to join their forces to fight against me.

Lucky me.

You see two days ago I was assembling a wheelbarrow (and no, it didn't go well) in my garage (I was getting paid to do this), where, out of nowhere, this bird tries to violently attack me.

Luckily I was separated from it - thank goodness for strong walls and windows.

But I'm getting ahead of myself and probably leaving you scratching your head and saying "what the heck is she talking about?".

It all started on Tuesday April 29, it was about 6:15 pm and I was reading a fashion magazine. My stepdad comes up to me and asks if I want to make some moohlah. I was like heck yes!

He took me out to my garage (a disgusting, filthy mess of a room) and told me to assemble this wheelbarrow he bought. I was like, "okay, but if I go to the emergency room, you're telling mom that it was your fault.

Me + Tools = Nightmare

He assured me that I was going to be fine. After making sure I had everything I needed, he left me to it. About 5 minutes in I realized that none of the pieces fit (and they didn't!) and I was mad.

I became more agitated when I heard this repeating "thud" noise. I mean, I was already mad and this annoying noise was making me even madder.

I look up to the one window in our garage and see this ugly bird flying against the window. If I didn't know better I would swear it was out looking for my blood.I got a little nervous. Make that beyond nervous.

I've never liked birds, with their beady little eyes and sharp beaks, well to be honest, they kind of freak me out.

Either it was one dumb bird or one seriously determined bird because it kept flying into the window.

I didn't want to take my chances - I bolted leaving the wheelbarrow unfinished.I figured that my life was probably better then a few measly bucks.

In conclusion, I now also hate birds, and everytime I see one I will think of this day and that bird that tried to kill me.

I'll never be safe again.

Plus they're ew.